Dr Jolene Church's Blog Page
A site dedicated to cultivating successful thinking
5/20/2018 0 Comments
Your Fault to Your Success
In each of us, success is hardwired into our DNA, but with that hard-wiring is a system fault. This fault in our wiring is the central component to doubt and fear. It is the driving force that holds you back from achieving your dreams, your goals, and provides you with justification for giving in or not achieving.
Your faith can move mountains and your doubt can create them.
The fault? Ego.
Ego is defined as “a person’s sense of self-esteem or self-importance.” Yet this is often based on unrealistic beliefs.
When we refer to ego, what typically comes to mind is the imbalance of ego, egotism. An egotistical person is considered “selfish and arrogant, excessively conceited, self-centered, or absorbed in themselves.” Ego does not support your success, but instead keeps you focused outside of the single place that you can drive change.
The ego’s role is to keep us trapped in the past or focused on lack. The only position of change is the present.
Many have heard and accept the definition of insanity as provided by Albert Einstein, “ doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.” A definition of insanity that is better suited when it comes to combatting the effects of our own destructive thinking, constructed by our ego, is believing in something that has not happened more than truth that exists in the present.
In other words, reality is rational thinking. Insanity is believing in unreal thoughts.
It is common for the ego to introduce a negative thought by introducing something from the past to use as an excuse or predicting a negative outcome into the future. When we allow insanity to take precedence in our thoughts, believing more in what is not than what is, then we short-circuit our success.
When we are self-centered, we cannot focus on the big picture and we cannot thrive in our talents and purpose. Ego holds you back.
There is much talk of mindfulness, and much confusion over what it is and how to practice its peace-giving ways. Simply put, mindfulness is a focus on the present. Mindfulness is the quality or state of being conscious or aware. In this state, we can drive out ego and gain clarity and awareness to achieve.
In my book Thinking 101: Fundamentals of a Successful Mindset, I explain how barriers to our thinking, whether self-imposed (by ego) or through environmental influences (to our ego), develop and hold us back from our natural state of successful thinking.
As children we do not see limits. We seek guidance because we don’t pretend to have all the answers. We are in a pure ego-less state. Over time, limits become introduced to our thinking and we allow our ego, and its insanity, to drive our decisions.
When we think, what are the odds of getting that job or anything else that we desire, we are allowing ego to introduce doubtful and unreal thoughts- insanity. We accept a belief of something that hasn’t even happened over what could happen.
Mindfulness begins with self-love, and this has nothing to do with conceit. When we love ourselves, we protect our mind and our potential from destructive thinking and anything that can destroy our peace.
When ego tries to drive you to a thought of being wronged, catapulting you into the past, it disrupts your peace in this moment- it robs you of your present peace. When ego tries to convince you of an undesired outcome, it disrupts your peace in this moment. Simply put, your ego, “sense of self-esteem or self-worth” is judgement.
Love does not judge. Many of us are our own worst enemy, because our “sense of self-esteem or self-worth” does not focus on self-love- which is preservation of our present peace. Present peace is a place that we can operate most effectively to be successful.
When we love ourselves and protect our peace, we are able to deconstruct doubt and fear and achieve our purpose. When we don’t allow fear and doubt in, we open ourselves up to opportunities that we would have otherwise closed ourselves off to.
Mahatma Gandhi said, “Where there is love, there is life.”
We cannot let fear and doubt rob us of the life that we desire. Anything that is not born of love is untrue and will not serve you.
This week your exercise is to identify and acknowledge when your peace is being robbed, when ego is taking you out of the present. There is no “poor me” or “he/she did this or that to me” in the present. The present is, “I am”. The present understands that in every experience is a lesson to use to improve our future.
You must be the change that you wish to see in the world. What will you base your reality on, truth or fiction?
As you catch your ego introducing non-productive thoughts, anything that contradicts what you desire, acknowledge by saying, “That thought is untrue and does not serve me. I am love. I create my own reality.”
Let your faith, belief in love, help you to achieve the success you were destined to achieve. Have a great week!
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Jolene holds Doctorate of Management in Organizational Leadership and is a certified master success coach. Jolene's writing is continually inspired by the challenges that her clients are facing. She finds constant inspiration in the world around her and is profoundly honored to be living her purpose helping others turn impossible into possible.