,Those who embrace successful thinking are not without down days and disappointment. Rather, those of a successful mindset realize that being in a state of mind that is unappealing can be changed through new thoughts. “The size of your success is measured by the strength of your desire, the size of your dream, and how you handle disappointment along the way” – Robert Kiyosaki.
A few weeks ago I had an MRI to help my doctors try to figure out why I had suddenly experienced strange nerve damage in my ear that resulted in 50% hearing loss. The MRI picked up a tumor. Let me tell you, to be told that you have a brain tumor is not what anyone wants to hear. Although it was a relief that the doctors found the cause of my migraines and hearing loss, it was unnerving.
“We don’t fear the unknown. We fear what we think of the unknown”- Teal Swan.
For weeks I have chosen not to focus on the fact that I have a brain tumor, but instead on the fact that had I not had a crazy ear infection and sudden hearing loss, the doctors would not have been looking inside my head in the first place.
Today I was transported onto an emotional ride that I did not see coming. Following a phone call from the neuro surgeon to set up my pre-op appointment, I couldn’t help but feel anxiety come over me. This is important, because many people that I talk ask me how to push past anxiety and fear and into a successful mindset. I’d like to assure you, you already have a successful mindset, you just need to operate from there.
It’s like having a high performance sports car, yet never getting in and driving it. You are afraid that you will wreck it, someone will steal it, or some other self-defeating thought- that’s okay and normal, but acknowledge that those aren’t thoughts that will get you to where you want to be- behind the wheel, driving your high performance machine, feeling the wind in your hair and the power beneath and all around you.
I don’t know why the call from the neuro surgeon threw me off so bad, but it did. In the past year I have transitioned from a 10 year victim of domestic violence (while married to a deputy sheriff) to a survivor. I also was the victor when the criminal justice system wrongly placed me, the victim of domestic violence, in the defending seat. Never did I waver in my belief that justice, the truth that I stood so proudly behind, would prevail.
It’s been a tough year, but I’ve maintained a successful mindset. So how was I so upset by a phone call from the neuro surgeon? As I sat in line at Starbucks, I began to cry, overcome by the emotions I was feeling. I quickly grabbed a napkin dabbing away the tears, as the car in front of me would be finished ordering soon. I gained my composure, pulled forward, and ordered my drink.
When I got to the window, the cashier informed me that the car in front of me paid for my drink. Had the driver seen me crying? Or had a force in the universe touched the heart of this person to “pay it forward?” Who would have known that the person that they just bought a drink for, out of a random act of kindness, just found out they needed surgery to remove a brain tumor?
As I thanked the barista and pulled away, tears streamed down my face. I whispered a silent, “thank you.” I needed to be reminded of goodness and joy in that moment. That simple act helped me shift back to a place where I could operate successfully.
It’s not that we won’t have disappointments and setbacks it’s how we CHOOSE to be that will determine our success. I challenge you to consider this as you face challenges to your successful mindset. It’s okay to get upset. Acknowledge your feelings, but don’t dwell in a place that you don’t wish to be. If you want to dwell in success, get in the driver’s seat. Opportunity awaits. DRIVE!
Jolene holds Doctorate of Management in Organizational Leadership and is a certified master success coach. Jolene's writing is continually inspired by the challenges that her clients are facing. She finds constant inspiration in the world around her and is profoundly honored to be living her purpose helping others turn impossible into possible.